Finding Comfort in the Pain

by | Jul 2, 2023 | 0 comments

            This past week was one of the most challenging weeks of my life, just like the previous week was for me, my family, and many other immediate family members and friends. My mom passed away on Thursday, June 22. It is a date that I will remember for the rest of my life. Since the day that she passed away, there was much that had to be done in order to make sure that mom’s viewing, funeral Mass, and luncheon after the Mass were as special as they could be. The reason for this is because everyone wanted to celebrate mom and the amazing person that she was.

            This is the first time that someone very, very, very close to me has passed away. It was partly my responsibility to help as much as I could with everything that needed to be taken care of from the day that my mom passed away up until the luncheon that took place after the funeral Mass. There were so many things that had to be taken care of during the last several days for everything to run as smoothly as they could with everything taking place this past week, mainly the viewing for mom, the funeral Mass, and the luncheon. I did not realize that there are so many things that must be done for each of these items I just mentioned.

            The viewing took place at the funeral home on the evening of Tuesday, June 27. The funeral Mass and luncheon took place on Wednesday, June 28. Everything was planned for over this two-day period because we wanted to celebrate my mom on her birthday. Mom would have been eighty years old on June 28. It was very fitting with how things turned out this way.

            From June 22 and all the way up through today, I have found different ways with grasping the fact that my mom is not around anymore. It is so hard to not be able to talk to her on the phone, visit her in the condominium where my dad still resides, purchase a gift for her, or take her and my dad out for an excursion to do something. Because I will not be able to do these and many other things with my mom because she is not around, it has been difficult not having her physically with us anymore. In order to deal with the pain caused by losing a loved one, I have done things that are comforting to me to help me deal with this. Below are some things that I do and will try to do. This list contains some things that have helped me. I hope that some of these help you if you have lost a loved one also. Keep in mind that I have not done all of these. I did some research to see how other people have dealt with the loss of a loved one. I have listed these below also. My goal for myself and you is to have these ideas readily available so that one or more of these can help each one of us, because we miss very much a very close loved one. I hope and pray that you find comfort in your pain during your time of loss. Prosit!


  • Looking at pictures of my mom and reminiscing about the things we did together.
  • Listening to my mom’s voicemails on my phone.
  • Watching recordings of family events which included mom.
  • Playing Christian music that helps with knowing mom is in no pain and she is resting in the arms of Jesus.
  • Living my life, the way that mom taught me – caring, sharing, kind, considerate, polite, thankful, compassionate, helping.
  • Using mom’s recipes to make a meal or to bake a dessert.
  • Praying to God to ask that mom look down on us every day.
  • Being comforted by other family members.
  • Enjoying fellowship with family and friends reminiscing about the good times that we had with my mom.
  • Focusing on people who are “good listeners.”
  • Joining a bereavement group to talk to people who are going through the same thing.
  • Celebrating mom’s life in different ways.
  • Taking care of yourself physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
  • Praying early each day and praying often throughout each day.